The Konfessioner's Word:
Well, the second select for this weeks Konfession Korner is Nikhil a 19 year Old based in Baramati.
His story stirred all the three konfessioners...
And so we thought... Hell! This one should be here...
Shin-Shin in particular was pretty impressed by it. The end especially.

-Nikhil Mahajan

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Author Intro:

Nikhil Panicker is a 19 year old biotechnologist. He is appropriately rebellious
Having commited suicide thrice, He is now
concentrating on completing his graduation in Bio-Tech from Baramati.

Now handing it over to Nik Pan..!

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God's FIngers

"Its not your fault.... My descision totally", he wrote, mirroring the immortal thoughts of Freddy Prinze Sr..He nervously looked over the three letters he had written;one to each of his parents, and the other to that fictional yet ever enduring entity they called God(A letter denouncing him, and his existence).This was it; the end,where he would discontinue to live,where the pain would all end,along with the memories,the suffering,the bloodsweattearslovehatemusic and all the other miscellaneous constituents of his wasted,essentially purposeless life.The internet,useful as it always is in such circumstances, provided him with a sure fire method; A simple,everyday, easy to use vanilla essence bottle seal.(Swallow it.If you dont choke on it and die immediately, itll rip your intestinal tract out and you'll be digested from the inside! Unbelievably simple! Guaranteed effective!! Completely infallible!!!).He pondered for a moment, why people would create sites like these with so much apparent enthusiasm.He chortled for a second, and suddenly admonished himself for letting his mind stray from the serious task at hand.He ran the innocous looking seal over his palm.
They say depression is the result of irregularities in the brain chemical level.They have no idea.No person can actually understand or explain manic depression, until he has gone through it himself..Its like a physics professor trying to explain why people find rainbows beautiful.Experience gives you insight into a situation that books will never be able to.True perspicuity can never come from the theoretical confines of written material.Brain chemicals my ass.
His hands were shaking as he placed the seal into his mouth, and a torrent of thoughts burst forth from his brain, pulsating and hitting him like digitized trucks,tearing him apart from the seams...
pain......
kill......
life.....
end.....
love....
please....
mom....
love...
pain.....
kill.......
die......
now......
must.....
force....
pain...
burst....
love....
mom....
pain.....
kill.....
He forced the seal down, and let out an angiushed wail, he could push no further...A sudden wave of self hate streamed through him,and he swallowed till he felt flesh tear... He spat the seal out, and it rolled over the floor. leaving behind a thin trail of blood.He felt the warm, steady, salty trickle gently flowing from the inside of his throat..He had done it.He lay down and waited for it to end.He had finally done it.He never thought he'd have the guts to pull it off,but he did! He had never felt so calm,and as he quietly waited for it to end,he visuallized his mother.Two tears gently rolled down his cheeks, and suddenly, everything had become clear.."I hope i dont die" were the words he kept thinking as the tears and the blood streamed on.He drifted off, slowly.
He woke the next morning,when the early morning sunlight hit his face.He didnt remember what had happened for a second,and suddenly he sat, up,recalling what had happened the previous night.He had survived.The previous night's letters and the bloody seal were the only reminders of what had happened."Did it really happen?", he thought, and just then he coughed out dried blood,His throat was still very sore, and it ached terribly, but he smiled nonetheless, for he knew that everything was going to br allright.The sunlight shone through the clouds in narrow beams of light,and they seemed to gently touch him.."God's fingers", he thought,"They call them God's fingers."

-Nikhil Panicker